..the kind of love..

When my sister and I were still kids, we were sickly. I remember the days when our grandmother and auntie would take turns in bringing us to the doctor. We have this formed habit though that whoever of us is sick would sleep with our Lola. It seemed that her bed had therapeutic claim that whoever lay down on that surface will get well. It's as though her hands have that warmth that when it touches your forehead, you believe the fever will not stay long. The milk that she would provide you before going to bed seemed to have a magical spell you'd think it's exclusively manufactured for a sick you. We would sleep then in peace, knowing that her eyes never wanders around and that you are being watched round the clock. Words are not always spoken in between but you know she had said it very well. This is the kind of love that we often receives when we are sick. 

One night in 1996, our house was ravaged with storm. I'm suffering then with high grade fever because of tonsillitis and ear infection. The roof of our house I feared would be stripped and water starts to come in. My grandmother wrapped me with blanket, cradled me on her lap while I was clinging on her arms. I fell asleep despite the storm brushing our windows and doors. I am reassured that as long as she's holding me tight, I am safe and no kind of storm can harm me. This is the kind of love that pacified me.

I was once a fool, too. Falling in love, believing in happy endings, at a price too high to pay. I made decisions without using my conscience and ended up straining relationships. I asked myself if this is the kind of love I'd be happy with. And you know what, if you are at the brink of longing to find answers out of your deepest emotions, you'll know that no matter how hard it is, God is giving you enough courage to make the wrongs right. This is the kind of love I want to live with. The kind that will make you grow in faith and directs you to your purpose, the one that gives you peace knowing that it feeds a good person in you, the one that makes you accept and love both the ugly and beautiful you, the one that makes your heart cherish the ordinary things right at your sight; and they become invincibly extraordinary,  and the one that makes you fall in love all the more with the Author of Life. This is the kind of love I'll die for. 

Everyday, we are facing different silent storms in life. Disappointments, betrayal, missed opportunities, unanswered prayers, failing and losing, the list goes on. Finding love then becomes difficult. We become too weary, We become exhausted. We become too fearful. But God, just like my grandmother,   grabs the blanket at once, wraps you in comfort and encircles His arms around you. So that no matter how lashing the storms inside and outside of you, you'll fall asleep knowing that no harm can reach the strands of your hair. Allow God to cradle you on His lap. Cling on His arms no matter what storm you are facing now. This is the kind of love that God offers. And the good news is, it's FREE.

 I look at the people around me. Their smiles and struggles, their worries and difficulties. I know how wounded the world is, for I am counting myself as one. Of all the wants and desires I have in my heart, this echoes the most: I want to be their kind of love.=)