..a little piece of heaven..

Photo credit to juanlucas "imbalanced" 

It was a cold night when the bus that we're riding momentarily stopped. I'm always glad God created buses with windows=) I feel like I'm "ventilating" looking through those transparent squares. I noticed a man on his broom sweeping the street's gutter under the light emanating from the post. It's chilling cold outside but he is diligently doing his job when a car from my view threw something in the area where he is cleaning. He picked it up with the use of his dustpan. There I learned that it was actually a 1 Riyal bill and not a garbage. I felt a surging pain in my heart. Tears are forming on my lids I needed to distract my thoughts so as not to let the tears fall. I feel for that man spending his time that moment of the cold night on the street instead with his family to earn money in a decent way--to put food on his family's table, to send his kids to school..The street is where he can freely move his hands to communicate with the world. The street is his place to stage his best. It is where he can prove his worth . It is his heaven. And a bill thrown as a garbage is such a disgusting sight for an educated person. Forgive me for being blatant but it's disheartening to witnessed such scene. What if that man is your father, or your brother, a cousin or a friend? And while   he is enduring the cold night, it's sad that there are people who puts monetary value on what I believe is a noble job. That there are some who measures other people's worth by face value. He may not be on a blue-collar job but he is doing a humane job. And he is worth more than that bill.

I arrived home that night reflecting why God allowed me to see such thing. Maybe that's why He created me with an inclination to sit near the window of the bus so I may write it down, you may be able to read it and that you and me may be reminded that each person is a piece of Jesus. Whatever he is doing is probably out of his passion, out of his calling, out of love for the people dear to him. Wherever he is at is probably where he finds his solitude..a calmness he cannot get elsewhere. That is his cocoon. That is where he finds refuge. That is his little piece of heaven.

Thank God for the red light that the bus stopped. And for that lamp post that shed light.

..a blogger's chant..

There are really times when nothing's much happening in your life yet you feel that shimmering awe in moments you are just laidback on a comfy couch in an untamed hair and conclude that you are definitely and abundantly blessed! It's good that you are not getting all the things that you are wanting. It's good that you've never been to places you wanted to step foot to. It's good that you seemed to be on a hiatus--a space..a pause. In this way you are motivated to keep going, to keep on striving, to keep on believing, to endure with  faith as your greatest fuel. That someday, you'll ex-listed some written dreams in your wishlist and believe that dreams do come true for someone with a brave heart. For someone who clings to her optimism in the face of bumps along the roads. The universe does connive for a dreamer, and yes it takes a lot of courage to chase after them. Sometimes, fear cripples you to stop. But don't listen on it. Never give a glance on it. As what my mentor said, everything you need is just outside your comfort zone. Instead, focus on the little voice that comes from the very core of your being. The one that tells you to stop your mundane thinking. I believe that when God put that desire in your heart, He provides you with the people you need, the place to begin your jump-start in achieving your goals, and the inspiration to propel forward. Fear is the greatest malady of all times and courage is the only antidote. 

I cannot think of anything fruitful to do but to be hideously here in my tenement. The tumult of the television cannot stop me from doing the thing that is giving me joy and fulfillment. The sun outside from the corner where I positioned myself is vibrant as the way I look things awaiting for me. I'm always been a concoction of optimism and pessimism. But whenever that great malady starts to disarm my hope, I'm going back to my core. There I find silence, there I find my peace, there I find hope, there I started to dream again. 

The pain I felt on my crossed legs brought me to my senses. 

The clock's ticking as it was designed to.

It's time to bid goodnight=)

..the gift called Pause..

"Why are we  embarrassed  by silence? What comfort do we find in all the noise?"- Tuesdays with Morrie

I arrived wasted last night. Wasted not because of inebriation (how I wish I was,lol) but because of an ardous workload in our ever busy ward. I swung the door open and no one is around, no clatters in the receiving room, even a left turned-on television. It's hard this way. The silence is reverberating all around the corners and you cannot identify the proper sound. Silence yells so loud that the echo bounce back big time. It's hazardous to the eardrums. 

As I lay wide awake after a nonchalant day, I recognized a gift not everyone wants to welcome; a gift often perceived as annoying. 

For the past years, I was not into a commitment or kind enough to say "no strings attached". I stayed to be carefree, stress-free, wrinkle-free, anniversary-free, boyfriend-free, whatever singles out there wants to call it. If basing my status on Maslow's Hierarchy of needs, it's a shame I cannot proceed to a higher level of the ladder..LOL At 26, I'm untamed. At 26, I'm on a pause. And so while I lazily watch the wide space of my room's ceiling and keeping my head overlaid on my comfy pillow, I thank God for the gift. 

Face it singles out there. We have a pretty honey-sweet life. We can dress ourselves with what we want without someone dictating us not to wear this or wear that. No one to pre-empt with your schedules should you want to date your girlfriends. No one to ask for your Facebook password and meticulously asking for who's-this-highschool-friend-of yours-asking-for-your-number. No one to re-shuffle the YOU to fit in to his own creation of who he wants you to be.

Annoyed by the pause? Think again. It's an ample time to renovate yourself after someone had hit you hard after a hurtful exit. Be the person that you want to be and go where you can throw your wings freely. Life is just really so short. Be sassy, live jovially, forget about the chase or else you will chase time for the moments wasted in chase, don't ask for miracles, be someone else's miracle. Don't settle for less because you were created with the most intimate love. Allow God to meddle and break you. Don't sew a space created by a goodbye. You are destined to propel to something better, not to be tied up to the persons who walked away from you. Pause for a while but get ready for the "strike of lightning" called love. God created them, and He created them for you. Just leave a space for that beautiful sparks of light. And never close your eyes..You don't want to miss the lightning, do you?=)

I'm single? Nah, just on a gift of Pause!