..The Face of Christmas..

I was in the elevator flipping my old Nokia phone. Let me describe it to you: I received it months before I graduated in college, some of the white face cover is peeling off and you have to hold the battery pack to counteract the law of gravity. Why I'm still using an obsolete phone? Because the worth of the one who gave it to me is far more than the worth of the phone itself. The woman smirked at me as I carefully  flipped it to answer a call. In a world that puts greater weight on material things, I felt I was measured by the face value of my phone. To put an end to the uncomfortable look out of using my "advance" Nokia mobile, I took my iPhone5 and read the reminder I kept for sometime that says "Don't give up your joy". Believe me, the smirk disappeared. 

It has always been a repeated question in the many Christmas Eve Mass that I have attended asking, "What if the Inn-keeper knew that it was Mary, the bearer of God's promise who is knocking at his door in that unholy hour?" 

Was she also a victim of a world that puts an emphasis on face value?

This Christmas, I pray that we all look back to that little world of manger. He could have given Mary the suite room booking  in Makati Med to deliver Jesus. But why He had chosen the simplest, humblest way?

I can only think of one.

God wants us to Simplify.

It's not what we have that makes life beautiful. It's what we can give that makes the lives of others worth living. Because between the silent of the night and the roar of heaven, God is teaching us to be more kinder than we can, more loving than we should be, more grateful than you already are, and  far better than good. 

I pray that you will see what gravity cannot take away: LOVE, PEACE, SURRENDER.

Merry Christmas!

..Finding Love and the Size 7 shoes..

I was out one day to look for a gift for our Thanksgiving Party. I happened to visit a store which really has good finds for clothes and shoes. A pair of white strapped sandal caught my attention primarily for its simplicity. I fit the right part with a marvelous smile as it looked so perfectly well with my foot. With time constraint to be back at the hospital before the curfew, I hurriedly took my size and paid it. Days unfolded fast and came the day to flaunt my new foot wear. I slipped my right foot and fixed it righteously. Then came the left part. I wondered why I can't fix it well since I managed to do it without sweat to my right foot. The big shameful realization hit me like an ice bucket challenge. 

I paid for a different pair of what I seemed to be a size 7 shoes.

Since I made it to a point not to give up my joy in whatever circumstance I'm in, I took a deep breath, not just once but how many times until I find laughing at myself.  

While I was on the bus going to the party and the sunset is so melodramatic I can't figure out where it took its stunning spell of beauty, I tried to extract the lessons from the loophole of hurrying things in life. 

Especially in love. 

Lesson # 1.

Just like buying that shoes, not because it fit well on your right foot, you have to forget the left one. In any relationship,  I believe in the cliche that goes "it takes two to tango". And in order to do the tango, the two should compliment each other. One has to give, the other to give in return. He must be interested in your passions, and you propel him to excel in things he believes make him better. 

Even if that means watching NBA together.

I don't think you can move forward gracefully with a different pair of shoes.

Chemistry is not a subject. It has to be in the subject(s).

Lesson #2.

Not because Time is ticking like a bombshell you have to sacrifice the entire reasons for committing to someone. I remained single for years because I believe you can't force love to take place. It has to happen naturally. Not "just because" everyone's getting hitch I'll hook up with someone else. Over my dead curves ( I mean my nose bridge) haha  

If you do so, you might just end up paying the price and later realize it's not worthy enough.

And useless enough.

Lesson #3.

That day, I wore slippers instead going to the hospital. Its comfort is still my refuge.

Choose the kind of love that makes you feel good about yourself despite of your many inadequacies. The one you can walk with distances you never thought you can manage to traverse. Because his presence enables you to aim higher. Distance then, becomes a number.

Sometimes, among the many shoes you're looking for, you'll realize that the slippers in the silent corner wins your heart over a stiletto.

Find a good slippers.

I'll keep that mismatched pair of shoes. One day, I'll snuggle in bed with my "best pair of slippers" and I'll whisper in his ear how I came to finally find our perfect fit after all the mismatches.

..The Soft Rants Of A Girl Who Writes: An Anniversary Special..

Four years ago, I fell in love. A cup of coffee, an empty space, my flair for words, my comfort with solitude, chewing some courage, digesting the light of my every experience, and the passion that resonates within me gave birth to my 4-year blogsite.

I was worst with writing back then. There were times when I cannot spell properly and for someone who loves to read and memory gap hasn't taken its toll on my healthy brain cells, it's quite disappointing that I have to Google it. There were times that despite the racing heartbeat to make an article, I ended up signing out and goes to sleep. There were times when I would say, "God, I can't write!"

 But my tenacity to express eluded my fears and setbacks.

Who cares if I will tell my stories? Who cares if I cannot use the right subject-verb agreement?  This is my platform, my stories are the prose I am able to rant. I'm going to write until the day comes that I won't be able to scribe.

I remember the words of Mother Teresa in one of the documentaries of her life. "If I didn't pick up one man and carried him in my arms, I wouldn't have able to carried the hundreds and thousands of poor in the streets. Take a single step in faith."

179 posts, 4 years of sharing fearlessly, 4 years of "still learning" in most humble ways, 4 years of being in love every day with what I'm doing, 4 years of still choosing to be in love with the gift He endowed to me. And it started with a single article 4 years ago.

I am an unadorned woman, probably lacks many skills when it comes to written media. But for the past years of blogging, I learned that I can trust my intuition. I learned that I can trust my heart. That if you want to touch lives, you have to be brave to learn to unravel the daily lessons that mostly comes in disguise of pain and discomfort, the dark lengths and corners, the inevitable gloomy days.
Because everything that happens has something to do with making us stronger, more resilient with what is coming, more trusting with the grace that won't leave us and will never leave us until we finally able to say that life is always and has always been beautiful if our hearts are open to be empowered.

Thank you once again for the years we've been together. For the unholy hours I would publish my posts and you would read it along with your cup of coffee or your worn out pajama. For forgiving my injustices when it comes to grammar and all. For allowing my own experiences to guide you in your struggles. For taking my life's lessons as your pointing arrow to either follow it or making it better.

Thank you for knowing me by reading my stories.

In my austere simplicity, I knew I am loved.
So I'm giving it back through the girl who writes.